This sparked a lot of internal chatter for me and as I think about my folks. First, they are having that "age denial" thing. They talk about "old people" but never mean themselves (they are both 82 this year). They keep everything, have a million plans to fix items, do crafts, travel, declutter, etc., except all they "do" really is go to doctors appointments and watch TV. For ME (I'm 52), I've noticed easy weight gain with menopause even though I exercise more diligently and deliberately than ever. I've also noticed that my balance is gone in the last year or so. I crash into walls and smash my legs on things. I'm also in the pre-diabetes range (5.7). And your example to describe an old person? I'm re-writing that story for MYSELF now because a lot of the examples I'm seeing are...not inspiring! Thanks for sharing so vulnerably with all of this!
Angie, the way you describe you folks is hilarious. "They keep everything, have a million plans to fix items, do crafts, travel, declutter, etc., except all they "do" really is go to doctors appointments and watch TV." I am sure there are millions of older people just like that. And I do not disparage them. But I try to do better. Thanks for giving me a laugh today, Angie! I needed it.
My punch to the gut came when, at 66, I listed a bunch of symptoms I later learned were characteristic of advanced hyperparathyroidism. Instead of deciding to run tests, my PCP just said, "Getting old sucks."
I don't know what to say about that, Elizabeth, except second opinion. But getting old does suck sometimes. But life itself sucks sometimes. So whatcha gonna do?
I've been working on an essay on feet --at least in my head, although I also have some half-baked Substack draft going, too-- so yours on the "Four Punches" couldn't have come at a better time.
Signed, Sheila, who descends stairs like an old person.
yes, I'll be 68 in a few months.....the last few months Jim has been answering my questions about 'whatever' with 'Because you're old! That's why' This puzzled me because I don't 'feel' old, except that my hip gets stiff sometimes, and I stretch each morning religiously, because if I don't, it will get 'stuck' again. Also I have noticed that I am treated a bit differently by opticians, 'young & ignorant' health care workers, than before. Am doing my best to stay strong and fit. The last time I stupidly bought a self help book and started reading it, I realized that I was 20+ years older than the 'experienced' person giving advice....it's not that I know it all, I don't. I'm just going to stop spending on stuff that I don't need. Actually, life is pretty good
Sherry, who is this "Jim?" God? A voice in your head? Whatever he is don't listen to him, lol. I get that Jim is probably your life partner--tell him you're still young from my perspective. What is old, anyway. It's just a word, just a number. Rock on, Sherry. The night is young.
Sheila, you're a bad person. Me too. I still have a Belgian cook book I checked out of the San Francisco Public Library in 1978. I hope I never have to pay the fine for that one, lol.
My moment that shocked me was seeing a t-shirt with a picture of a bemused man who looked sorta my age. The caption read: “The look you have when you realize that you’re the same age as old people!”
That's a good one, James. There always comes a time when we realize the inconvenient truth--we are old. But it doesn't have to be bad. It's just who we are and we can make the best of it. Keep laughing, James.
Old age has a lot to do with how you think and how you maintain your health. We are 75 and putting a new roof on our house ourselves. I have already dug a huge garden (by hand) where I grow all our food supply. We never think “old” because we aren’t yet.
Roofing at 75? That's amazing. You two are really in great shape. I'm humbled. Thanks for reading, and keep on truckin'. It's readers like you that keep me excited about my life in old age.
Thank you Gary. I’m 65 and noticing those indicators of old age and wondering how many are due to lifestyle/exercise choices and how many are still fixable. But the first word on my list is grateful. Grateful to still be here smelling the roses and walking the hills even if I am a little slower.
Thanks for reading Ethel. I am grateful too. Happy to be anywhere, lol. I am terrible at exercising, but I do believe it can improve our lives. I need to start walking but I don't. But I will do it I'm sure. Thanks so much for reading. I really appreciate it.
As a rookie teacher I learned the importance of reflection. While it’s important to reflect on all aspects of your life you also need to just let go and live it, which also means facing the inevitable prospect of dying. Western culture places to much emphasis on the individual, letting go of your ego and merging with your community brings the greatest enjoyment of living.
Yeah, Gail, it's not a time for quick fixes. Old age dawns and then lingers for decades possibly. It must be a horror show for a hypochondriac. I guess I should have said, old age ain't for sissies, but that's probably politically incorrect. I am finding that old age offers infinite possibilities for a writer. All roads lead there, and all people must walk the road to old age. Old age is universally shared--oh my, I'm caught in a string of platitudes. I don't know how to get out of this and I'm talking to a psychologist, lol. Help! Throw me a couch.
Degenerative genetic disability taught me all these lessons only decades too early. You work with the hand you’re dealt. Understanding reaching old age is something you can’t take for granted and the longer you live the more you’ll suffer rearranges your priorities. Acceptance is the only way forward. Quality of life becomes the goal. For me that’s about practicing my faith and spreading love abundantly. Gratitude is essential.
Emily, you are right. Acceptance and Gratitude is the way forward. Thanks so much for reading and committing. Spreading love and helping others takes the focus off our pain.
I agree, Kerri. Many young people see old age as all downside. For me it's all upside, even with the challenges. Thanks so much for reading, Kerri. I'm glad I'm still here. I'm glad you're here.
Great article Gary! I'm a few years younger than you but got the shock of my life a few months back when I watched an outside security camera video of myself walking out into the backyard with our dog for his 5:00 AM wee (he needs a bodyguard due to our neighborhood coyotes).....OMG!!! .....Who is that geezer with the Grampa McCoy walk???? That can't be me!!!! I'm still a teenager in my head......what the hell happened to my body?????
Then again I guess I'd rather be growing old than the alternative.....
This sparked a lot of internal chatter for me and as I think about my folks. First, they are having that "age denial" thing. They talk about "old people" but never mean themselves (they are both 82 this year). They keep everything, have a million plans to fix items, do crafts, travel, declutter, etc., except all they "do" really is go to doctors appointments and watch TV. For ME (I'm 52), I've noticed easy weight gain with menopause even though I exercise more diligently and deliberately than ever. I've also noticed that my balance is gone in the last year or so. I crash into walls and smash my legs on things. I'm also in the pre-diabetes range (5.7). And your example to describe an old person? I'm re-writing that story for MYSELF now because a lot of the examples I'm seeing are...not inspiring! Thanks for sharing so vulnerably with all of this!
Angie, the way you describe you folks is hilarious. "They keep everything, have a million plans to fix items, do crafts, travel, declutter, etc., except all they "do" really is go to doctors appointments and watch TV." I am sure there are millions of older people just like that. And I do not disparage them. But I try to do better. Thanks for giving me a laugh today, Angie! I needed it.
Gary, so glad to have brought some humor into your day!
My punch to the gut came when, at 66, I listed a bunch of symptoms I later learned were characteristic of advanced hyperparathyroidism. Instead of deciding to run tests, my PCP just said, "Getting old sucks."
I don't know what to say about that, Elizabeth, except second opinion. But getting old does suck sometimes. But life itself sucks sometimes. So whatcha gonna do?
Maybe you should get another PCP.
I've been working on an essay on feet --at least in my head, although I also have some half-baked Substack draft going, too-- so yours on the "Four Punches" couldn't have come at a better time.
Signed, Sheila, who descends stairs like an old person.
Glad I gave you a leg-up on your foot essay, Sheila.
--Signed, Gary who descends very, very carefully. Thanks for reading.
yes, I'll be 68 in a few months.....the last few months Jim has been answering my questions about 'whatever' with 'Because you're old! That's why' This puzzled me because I don't 'feel' old, except that my hip gets stiff sometimes, and I stretch each morning religiously, because if I don't, it will get 'stuck' again. Also I have noticed that I am treated a bit differently by opticians, 'young & ignorant' health care workers, than before. Am doing my best to stay strong and fit. The last time I stupidly bought a self help book and started reading it, I realized that I was 20+ years older than the 'experienced' person giving advice....it's not that I know it all, I don't. I'm just going to stop spending on stuff that I don't need. Actually, life is pretty good
Sherry, who is this "Jim?" God? A voice in your head? Whatever he is don't listen to him, lol. I get that Jim is probably your life partner--tell him you're still young from my perspective. What is old, anyway. It's just a word, just a number. Rock on, Sherry. The night is young.
Fascinating article Gary, written in your own inimitable and entertaining style. Thanks so much. I'm going to check that book out too
Yes, please check out the book. Becca Levy is a great writer and an advocate for us for sure.
Excellent insight from along the way with understandable science. Thank you.
I'm glad you liked it, Pat! I don't usually include science in my articles, but Levy's study is compelling. Thanks for reading, Pat!
OH, yeah. The book. Just tried to check it out of the library but I gotta pay my fines first.
Sheila, you're a bad person. Me too. I still have a Belgian cook book I checked out of the San Francisco Public Library in 1978. I hope I never have to pay the fine for that one, lol.
Thank you Gary. Yes, acceptance is the road to take. We are seeing, living, breathing - from the golden side. Enjoy the enlightenment.
We'll be enlightened together, MF. In fact, we're already enlightened.
My moment that shocked me was seeing a t-shirt with a picture of a bemused man who looked sorta my age. The caption read: “The look you have when you realize that you’re the same age as old people!”
I cracked up laughing.
That's a good one, James. There always comes a time when we realize the inconvenient truth--we are old. But it doesn't have to be bad. It's just who we are and we can make the best of it. Keep laughing, James.
Old age has a lot to do with how you think and how you maintain your health. We are 75 and putting a new roof on our house ourselves. I have already dug a huge garden (by hand) where I grow all our food supply. We never think “old” because we aren’t yet.
Roofing at 75? That's amazing. You two are really in great shape. I'm humbled. Thanks for reading, and keep on truckin'. It's readers like you that keep me excited about my life in old age.
Thank you Gary. I’m 65 and noticing those indicators of old age and wondering how many are due to lifestyle/exercise choices and how many are still fixable. But the first word on my list is grateful. Grateful to still be here smelling the roses and walking the hills even if I am a little slower.
Thanks for reading Ethel. I am grateful too. Happy to be anywhere, lol. I am terrible at exercising, but I do believe it can improve our lives. I need to start walking but I don't. But I will do it I'm sure. Thanks so much for reading. I really appreciate it.
As a rookie teacher I learned the importance of reflection. While it’s important to reflect on all aspects of your life you also need to just let go and live it, which also means facing the inevitable prospect of dying. Western culture places to much emphasis on the individual, letting go of your ego and merging with your community brings the greatest enjoyment of living.
I agree 100 percent, James. Your comment is deep.. There is an essay lurking in it. Thanks for commenting.
Hooray! Your grateful readers wouldn’t have you any other way, either. Thanks, Gary!
Kathleen, it always amazes me that anyone wants to know what I think. I'm glad you're one of them. Thanks for reading.
I love your statement that old age isn’t for cowards, dreamers or schemers. So true!
Yeah, Gail, it's not a time for quick fixes. Old age dawns and then lingers for decades possibly. It must be a horror show for a hypochondriac. I guess I should have said, old age ain't for sissies, but that's probably politically incorrect. I am finding that old age offers infinite possibilities for a writer. All roads lead there, and all people must walk the road to old age. Old age is universally shared--oh my, I'm caught in a string of platitudes. I don't know how to get out of this and I'm talking to a psychologist, lol. Help! Throw me a couch.
Thanks for reading, Gail.
Two thoughts: I love finding someone here older than me (73), and I share your outlook on life! Well said.
Dave I'm happy we share the same positive (with a dash of humor and snark) outlook. If we don't have a sense of humor we're in for a rough ride.
Thanks Gary. Good article, I found it v useful.
Thanks, Michael.
Degenerative genetic disability taught me all these lessons only decades too early. You work with the hand you’re dealt. Understanding reaching old age is something you can’t take for granted and the longer you live the more you’ll suffer rearranges your priorities. Acceptance is the only way forward. Quality of life becomes the goal. For me that’s about practicing my faith and spreading love abundantly. Gratitude is essential.
Emily, you are right. Acceptance and Gratitude is the way forward. Thanks so much for reading and committing. Spreading love and helping others takes the focus off our pain.
I have had type 1 diabetes since I was seven and what you said resonates — reaching old age is something I do not take for granted.
I agree, Kerri. Many young people see old age as all downside. For me it's all upside, even with the challenges. Thanks so much for reading, Kerri. I'm glad I'm still here. I'm glad you're here.
Great article Gary! I'm a few years younger than you but got the shock of my life a few months back when I watched an outside security camera video of myself walking out into the backyard with our dog for his 5:00 AM wee (he needs a bodyguard due to our neighborhood coyotes).....OMG!!! .....Who is that geezer with the Grampa McCoy walk???? That can't be me!!!! I'm still a teenager in my head......what the hell happened to my body?????
Then again I guess I'd rather be growing old than the alternative.....
Thanks, HobbleGeeble, for giving me a much-need laugh this Sunday morning,